Archive for the ‘Geekery’ Category

Chris Imitates Art

Thursday, March 11th, 2010

I’ve been having fun re-learning how to make vector art stuff lately. (Learn the difference between vector and raster graphics here. The quick explanation is that raster graphics are comprised of pixels, while vector graphics are created with mathematically-defined shapes and lines.) I used to love drawing when I was younger but, quite frankly, I’m horrible with pencil and paper. I love the clean lines of vector art; there’s something just so shiny and fresh about it.

So, last week I started picking things and drawing them, letting my imagination run wild. My first few attempts sucked. They sucked so hard that they became little black holes of suckitude which swallowed some nearby files. But then my brain started linking up some old memories, rerouting power to long-abandoned booze-flooded power stations, and suddenly things started clicking.

As strange as it may sound, I sort of forgot that I could draw for the last few years. I’m pretty sure that the crazy years following high school have something to do with it. (Note to the kids: The drink known as the “Mind Eraser” makes a titular claim that it intends to back up.) I’m no Picasso, but I surprised myself with how well some of my most recent stuff turned out. Here’s my new avatar that I’m posting everywhere.

I drew some other stuff (a whale, a bass guitar, the wife), but can’t seem to find where I saved those files. Anyway, I got so excited with my drawing that I decided to make some fan art. I chose to pay homage to one of my favorite webcomics out there, Hijinks Ensue. The inspiration comes from the character Josh’s love of bacon and this infamous picture from collegehumor.com (warning: contains two clothed chicks kissing on a pile of beer kegs). Here it is. (Clicking it gives you a gargantuan version you can use as a desktop wallpaper if you like. Yes, you have my permission.)

As I draw more stuff, I’ll upload it here. I’d appreciate your feedback and/or drawing tips and if you have any art you’ve created, I’d be happy to link to it. I’ll also be incorporating some *actual* artwork into my webcomic, Geek Sauce, in the future, so be sure to check in there every Tuesday and Friday.

Bonus Link! One of my favorite artist blogs can be found here: I Fail At Life, That’s Why I Became An Artist

Darth Side of the Moon

Thursday, February 4th, 2010

Like all of my desktop wallpaper, I don’t know exactly where I picked this up but this sweet Pink Floyd/Star Wars mashup was created by James Lillis. You can see some cool t-shirts created by James by following this link.

Click to embiggen.

I Blarg Star Wars

Monday, January 25th, 2010

Though I’m a bit more of an Indiana Jones geek (despite the Crystal Skull abomination), I’ve got to give it up for the ‘wars. For some great Star Wars-themed geekiness, check out Distracted By Star Wars, which is where I found this image.

Hot Fall Fashion: The Tauntaun Costume

Thursday, November 19th, 2009

When you decide that you’re going to build something as ambitious and ubergeeky as a fully articulated and mobile costume of Luke Skywalker riding a tauntaun (like in Empire), it’s important to remember to build it out of 100% pure win. You’re not going to want to cut corners in this regard, because a lot of places out there will try to sell you Fail at such a great discount that you’re going to be tempted. Bite the bullet and spend the few extra bucks for top quality Win, and get the imported stuff when available.

I’m happy to report that this is exactly what Scott Holden did when building the incredible costume featured in the video below. He must have worked long and hard on it, which is especially admirable considering that the tauntaun will undoubtedly freeze before it reaches the first marker.

Check out the design/build photos over here.

Hoth, ftw.

I've Got Google Wave Invitations To Give Away…

Friday, November 13th, 2009

But I’m not just going to give them away. Oh, no. I had to do some things I’m not too proud of to get my original invite, so here’s what I’m going to do.

The first SEVEN comments I get to this blog post that include something that makes me laugh gets an invite. It can be anything: a picture, a joke, a funny pick-up line, a story, a limerick.

Yes, I’m serious. I like funny stuff and extra points for geeky. And please, only comment if you don’t have a Wave invite. No invite stockpiling. Remember to give your email address in the post, or it’ll go to the next person.

Remember, it takes time for the invite to process, so give it a few days.

What are you waiting for? Get commenting!

Google Wave Me, Please, Thanks.

Thursday, October 1st, 2009

The following are the things I’ll do for a Google Wave invite.

1) I’ll tell you how great you look in those pants. Alternately, if you’re not wearing any pants, I’ll tell you how sexy your legs look (in a totally non-creepy way).

2) I’ll post a link to absolutely whatever you’d like on my blog. No joke, MY BLOG, the one you’re reading now, gets literally TENS of hits every day from people I don’t even know! Who are these people? Why do they worship my with their eyes? Unsolved mysteries, but I’ll post whatever you’d like to show them.

3) I will give you my secret recipe for ice-cream soup.

4) I’ll write a haiku about how grateful I am that you gave me invitation to “surf” the “gwave” with you.

5) I’ll give a link that was sent to me by a real-life INTERNET MILLIONAIRE. Allegedly, for a small one-time fee, he’ll share with you his ultimate secrets of online success! I can’t believe I haven’t emailed this guy a check yet, but I’m passing this amazing opportunity along to YOU!

6) I’ll post one time on the topic of your choosing. It can be anything. Yak anuses. Civil rights. Beer. Group sex. British comedy. Chocodiles. Bagpipes. The environment. Beverages you can make in your prison toilet. You pick it, I’ll stick it… up on my blog.

7) I’ll sing the song “Mandy” out loud, in front of my house, and replace the name Mandy with whatever your name is. Even if it’s really long, I’ll make it work. I’m a musician, you know.
8) Five minutes of uninterrupted eye contact via a posted photo of myself. (Hey! Wordpress just turned that number 8 and close parenthesis into a smiley face w/ sunglasses. Well, if that isn’t just like a hat blowing onto your head on a sunny day…)

9) I’ll make a sculpture out of mashed potatoes and send you a picture of it.

10) I’ll think of you fondly. (This one is probably the most valuable if you are currently on my shit-list.)

And the best prize (some would say “the only actual” prize) is this one…

11) I will write a short science-fiction story with YOU as the main character. There could be robots. There might be scantily clad green chicks. There will probably be a death ray or doomsday device involved. There could be aliens even. I’m completely serious. In fact, if you can get me an invitation, you won’t be able to stop me from writing a short story about you.

You’ll be able to show it around and everything. Literally –and literarily– a winner is YOU!

winnerisyou

All this can be yours for only the price of 1 (one) invitation to ride the watery lightning of the Goog-nami.

Email me at chrishokeblog [at] gmail.com when you’re ready. Operators are standing by… somewhere.

Better Safe Than Sorry.

Friday, September 25th, 2009

cthulu_warning

And that girl named Stacy Griffith? That was ME.

No, that’s not right. I simply love the way this was crafted, though… heehee…

(From Cory Doctorow via Wil Wheaton.)

Eagles, Verbal Slaps, and One Ring To Rule Them All

Thursday, July 16th, 2009

Due to a recent work-scheduling conflict and economic deflation, the wife and I have been spending quite a bit of time together at home. And whenever we spend a lot of time together, my wife will inevitably suggest a certain activity that, while I enjoy it, it certainly takes it’s toll on me.

“Do you want to watch Lord of the Rings?” she asked, innocently, a few days ago.

So, the last few days have been spent watching orcs get massacred at Helms Deep, laughing at Legolas’ surfing abilities, talking about dwarf tossing, and just generally mocking Tolkien. We own the full 5-hour-each extended versions, too, of course.

“So, eagles come in and rescue Sam and Frodo off of the mountainside at the end, right?” she asked me today after we’d finally finished Return of the King.

“Yes, that’s what happened.”

“So, why couldn’t Frodo and Sam have been dropped off there in the beginning by the eagles? Avoid the trip altogether, pop into Mount Doom for 15 minutes, toss the ring in, no fuss, no muss, and be home in time for eleventh breakfast?”

“Well, there were orcs there… Gandalf couldn’t talk to the eagles at the beginning… The giant cat-eye would have seen them…” I tried thinking this through and gave up. “Oh, I don’t know. Eagles are dicks?”

“You remember when the eagle rescued Gandalf from the tower in the first movie? Gandalf jumps off of Isengard, ala Marty McFly in Back To The Future Part II, and lands on the eagle?”

“Yes, I remember. The first time I saw it, I thought he was going eat that little messenger bat. Excellent BTTF reference, by the way, babe.” I said.

“Thanks. Anyway, I would have totally done a victory lap around the tower. I would have been all ‘YEEEEEEAH! It’s a f**kin’ eagle, b****! What you gonna do ’bout this, huh, Sarumon?! What you gonna do?! Isengard? More like Isen-lame! Suck it!’ That’s what I would have done.”

“You wish you had an eagle, don’t you, love?”

“Oh god yes.”